Zen and Uke

First, the Zen:

Joshu asked Nansen: `What is the path?'
Nansen said: `Everyday life is the path.'
Joshu asked: `Can it be studied?'
Nansen said: `If you try to study, you will be far away from it.'
Joshu asked: `If I do not study, how can I know it is the path?'
Nansen said: `The path does not belong to the perception world, neither does it belong to the nonperception world. Cognition is a delusion and noncognition is senseless. If you want to reach the true path beyond doubt, place yourself in the same freedom as sky. You name it neither good nor not-good.'
At these words Joshu was enlightened.

As we did hanasu last night the age old question of: "Which one of us is doing this wrong" came to mind. Sometimes with some of the class mates it feels like uke sort of just lays his hand on my wrist so i get no real downward force or forward momentum to move around or respond to so i sorta stumble around the guy in an effort to atleast do the techniuqe and it just turns to an awkward mush by the end of it. But then again, maybe that's how it's supposed to be and i've been doing it wrong the whole time. I don't think that's it but it IS possible. It especially happens on #2. And when the whole thing feels awkward i get a little flustered and then the whole fishing reel really begins to unwind.

I don't know if i'm good at uke or not, and it's quite possible that everyone else is thinking the same thing about me, but i don't think i'm screwing up that specific thing atleast. Hanasu never turns out that way with Pat Sensei or Gary. Maybe it's a mass thing or height thing? Don't know.

We also did hanasu in "kata mode" last night and doing the tecniques in "non-experiment" mode is something i need practice on. Hopefully all of us student types can get a grasp on the polished side of things before the big aiki buddy meeting. It would be bad +1 if we all looked... a little less knowledgable.. on our home turf.

Air falls are something else i need to work on, or atleast mentally prepare for. It was interesting to play around with how the lead arm's rigidness affected the fall. Weighlessness seemed to go a long way and the arm seemed to get shorter... sort of like only the elbow up realy had any sense at all in determinging my direction but the shoulder definatley played the bigger part. I need to buy a crash pad.