Thursday, February 08, 2007
Dedication.
This one's a tad short. I've just sorta been thinking about my training and how dedicated i seem to be. I live 85 or so miles from the dojo, so it's sorta a long haul from home to class and back. I've missed a lot of class nights lately and though most of them have been due to random events from school to car work and things in between, there have been a couple where i just didn't want to make the trip. I love aikido and enjoy going to class, but sometimes the will to go just isn't there. On the nights i don't go i know i'm not going to be getting any practice in elsewhere to compensate for what i've missed as a matter of fact class is the only time i get any reall practice at all other than doing tegatana and pondering on things in my noggin. Dave Lowry once wrote to the effect that one who is serious should go to class no matter what because you never know if it will be there tomorrow. I happen to know how true this actually is through various experiences in the past but if a student misses class on purpose is he slacking off? I feel guilty (and more to follow as soon as i hit publish) because i'm not giving it a hundred percent. Anyhoo, those are my thoughts at the moment.
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5 comments:
A few things to remember. First off, even if you are slacking, it doesn't mean that you enjoy it any less when you do go. Secondly, everyone slacks now and again. This isn't pre WW2 with dedicated uchi-deshi that do nothing other than tend the master's crops, dust his house, cook his food, and martial arts. That being said, yes you're slacking but driving 85 miles to class sets a higher bar for you to slack off from. You show more dedication driving there semi-regularly than some other people in our home town who want to go, but don't. I don't think half the people who attend would attend if it was a little farther away. Even Bryce said the only reason he initially started was because it was there. If an old school uchi-deshi only practised two hours a day instead of three he's technically slacking, but that's still more than almost anyone else does. So slacking is relative to the person.
85 miles. Wow.
I'm impressed that you make it to class at all.
Don't be so hard on yourself, the drive is hard work.
Seems to me you are plenty dedicated, but for some reason, you have a different idea of what you should be doing. There are no rules about how often you should go, or how quickly you should advance. You should just do what you want to do, and enjoy the experience. If you have to make any comparisons, feel good about the fact that you are already making more of an effort than 99.9% of the rest of the population. Your Aikido is steadily improving, and there's no reason to berate yourself for what you think you should be doing differently.
I know how you feel, Andy. When I left college and moved to this area I was used to working out an average of about 35 hours per week. There was no club here other than a couple of my white-belt students and I wound up making the 90-ish mile to Baton Rouge once a week just to be able to train with someone that could survive the nidan stuff I was getting ready to demonstrate. The long commute made me feel... well, transient.
We _have_ been missing you at class, Andy, but we also all know that everyone has a life and that you are making an extraordinary effort. I hope to see you again soon.
Wow, thanks for the comments guys.
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